daal wrote:
I'm hearing a certain element of complacency in this
...
it feels as if you may have lost your drive. In order to keep improving, you need to care about winning each game and the way you describe your attitude, it sounds as if you don't. I think you need to conjure up your fierceness before you play.
Its not complacency as much as its contentment.
Yeah, I've lost my drive [to strive for higher rank]. But I don't *need* to improve. I don't *want* to care about winning. I don't want to be fierce [in competition].
This is not my problem. There's nothing wrong with not wanted to be the best at something. Its ok to enjoy an activity without needing to improve and be the best.
I have drive and desire and fierceness in other areas of my life. I don't need those to be misplaced in a hobby.
I'm content to be at the level I am. But I'm not as content to feel like I'm slipping behind. Either I need to adjust my feelings of contentment, or I'm wondering if something else might be wrong.