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Increasing patience
http://www.lifein19x19.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=1277		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Kirby [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 3:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Increasing patience
I don't think I have much patience. Any tips for improving patience (in go or in life)?
Author:  CarlJung [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 3:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
Keep your goal in mind.
Author:  kukula [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 3:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
There are different types of patience:

Putting up with other people's abuse.

Putting up with hardship in working to achieve something substantial.

To put up with abuse, it might help to think about how people who abuse others are actually caught up in confusion that ultimately will harm them a lot more than others. It's good to take whatever steps to prevent them from abusing others, but without going the extra step of seeing them as inherently evil and thus deserving to be abused. It doesn't help anybody to keep spinning that cycle.

As for hardship - good of course to reflect on the value of the goal, but one can also think about the hardships others have undergone in achieving their own goals.
Author:  deja [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 3:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
1. Enjoy the little things in life.
2. Think of your goals as steps along the way rather than ends.
3. Have plenty to do while you wait.
4. Have kids.
Author:  GoCat [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 9:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
I suggest meditation. Mindfulness meditation, in particular.

Now, I wish I could say I was making that suggestion based on my own experience. I've dabbled in meditation for decades, and never stuck with it. But my sense is that it is literally a practice in which you get better at many aspects of your inner life -- such as patience.
Author:  usagi [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 10:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
Kirby wrote:
I don't think I have much patience. Any tips for improving patience (in go or in life)?


I don't know if it will help, but try watching this video about marshmallows:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amsqeYOk--w
Author:  kokomi [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 10:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
Kirby wrote:
I don't think I have much patience. Any tips for improving patience (in go or in life)?


I was very impatient in go recently, always want to resign if i feel behind in the first 100 moves.

Today i had a game with one of my classmate, and the same feeling came. I talked with oren in the l19 room, and this eased my nervous. And as the game going on, i can focus more and more fully in the game.

Then I played a simul game with a 4D, and it gives me more freedom, as he is playing with another 7 at the same time. So i can control the game at my pace. (He did complain that i played too slow when the game comes into yose, as this is the only unfinished game :twisted: )
Author:  kokomi [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 10:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
what i mean... i guess what i posted was confusing... is that when you feel impatient, do something that attracts your attention away for a while. If you don't force yourself to put 100% attention in it, you'll feel easy to deal it.
Author:  calm [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 10:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
GoCat wrote:
I suggest meditation. Mindfulness meditation, in particular.

What's minfullnes meditation? Aside from Jon Kabat-Zin that is.
Author:  GoCat [ Tue Aug 03, 2010 10:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
calm wrote:
GoCat wrote:
I suggest meditation. Mindfulness meditation, in particular.

What's minfullnes meditation? Aside from Jon Kabat-Zin that is.

If you've read Kabat-Zin, you probably know as much (or as little) as I.

Honestly, I'm not qualified to give a good answer. But if you want, PM me and I'll send you a short list of books that I've enjoyed on the topic.
Author:  kirkmc [ Wed Aug 04, 2010 12:55 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
GoCat wrote:
I suggest meditation. Mindfulness meditation, in particular.

Now, I wish I could say I was making that suggestion based on my own experience. I've dabbled in meditation for decades, and never stuck with it. But my sense is that it is literally a practice in which you get better at many aspects of your inner life -- such as patience.


Likewise.

Here's a site for an online sangha (meditation group): http://www.treeleaf.org/

One thing that could help cultivate patience is to play very, very slow go games. I like to play games on my board over KGS. I have a few friends I play games with like that from time to time. These games can take an hour and a half or so, and I take my time and think carefully. Naturally, if you can play OTB games, that's even better, but I live in a rural area so that's not possible.
Author:  azrael [ Wed Aug 04, 2010 1:25 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
On a related subject --- I am playing against someone on a turn based server who hates my playing style. He has posted sarcastic comments at my direction because he can't handle my style and is losing quite badly. At the moment in a few of the games he is actually committing suicide with his 'alive' groups, i.e purposely making one eye or putting a group in self atari. He/She hasn't done anything rude per se but it just smacks of bad sportsmanship Its getting fairly annoying now. How would people generally deal with this sort of behaviour?
Author:  lorill [ Wed Aug 04, 2010 1:30 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
azrael wrote:
On a related subject --- I am playing against someone on a turn based server who hates my playing style. He has posted sarcastic comments at my direction because he can't handle my style and is losing quite badly. At the moment in a few of the games he is actually committing suicide with his 'alive' groups, i.e purposely making one eye or putting a group in self atari. He/She hasn't done anything rude per se but it just smacks of bad sportsmanship Its getting fairly annoying now. How would people generally deal with this sort of behaviour?

On a turn based game ? I would resign, and never play again with this player.
Author:  kirkmc [ Wed Aug 04, 2010 1:41 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
azrael wrote:
On a related subject --- I am playing against someone on a turn based server who hates my playing style. He has posted sarcastic comments at my direction because he can't handle my style and is losing quite badly. At the moment in a few of the games he is actually committing suicide with his 'alive' groups, i.e purposely making one eye or putting a group in self atari. He/She hasn't done anything rude per se but it just smacks of bad sportsmanship Its getting fairly annoying now. How would people generally deal with this sort of behaviour?


What you describe certainly is rude. If they're just plonking stones on the (virtual) board without any intention of really playing, that's rude. I'd just not play any more moves in the game and let the time run out.
Author:  palapiku [ Wed Aug 04, 2010 12:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
Kirby wrote:
I don't think I have much patience. Any tips for improving patience (in go or in life)?

Chop wood, carry water...
Author:  CarlJung [ Wed Aug 04, 2010 2:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Increasing patience
usagi wrote:
Kirby wrote:
I don't think I have much patience. Any tips for improving patience (in go or in life)?


I don't know if it will help, but try watching this video about marshmallows:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amsqeYOk--w


That was really funny, and useful.
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