Life In 19x19

Hi everybody,

I first started playing Go at the age of 17 on an Anime-Convention. I was an active player on KGS for about a year, then I stopped because I didn't enjoy it anymore - I was frightened of losing or making mistakes (which may have been my biggest one) and was too focused on improving my rank.
Now, about 9 years later, I fell in love with the game again. Since the end of May I played every day and continued reading my old Go books, solving tsumego again, making friends at the Go servers and so on. This time I wont let myself prevent me from having fun. Of course I still want to become stronger, but I "permit" myself to make mistakes and lose games - it's just part of the game and the learning experience and will help me to improve.

So, here I am. I hope to find/give some advice, interesting discussions and contacts connected to Go.

Moin Taito,

and welcome—I think you’ll like it here

Taito wrote:[..] I stopped because I didn't enjoy it anymore - I was frightened of losing or making mistakes (which may have been my biggest one) and was too focused on improving my rank.

Sounds like Online Go Anxiety, I know this too, though I’m not really concerned about my (low) rank. I also found that (for me) it has a lot to do with too short time settings (I have enough deadlines in my job already), and (also for me) it happens neither in Real Life™ games nor in online games with people I’m acquainted with, no matter how distantly.

[..] This time I wont let myself prevent me from having fun.

Good

Of course I still want to become stronger, but I "permit" myself to make mistakes and lose games - it's just part of the game and the learning experience and will help me to improve.

I’ve found that teaching beginners and giving them enough handicap relieves me of the fear of losing since there I lose about 50% of the games (given that we’ve found an appropriate handicap) and I realized that losing against, say, 5 stones on 9x9, really doesn’t mean that I dramatically failed—it means rather that my teaching is successful

Nice blog BTW

I assume you already know the German DGoB forum … ?


Herzliche Grüße aus der Lüneburger Heide,

Tom

I like to try and remind people, that its actually possible to lose every game you ever play, and yet still improve (its just that your server rank would never show it).

losing is one of the best ways to improve, because we learn best from our mistakes.

Bonobo wrote:Sounds like Online Go Anxiety, I know this too, though I’m not really concerned about my (low) rank. I also found that (for me) it has a lot to do with too short time settings (I have enough deadlines in my job already), and (also for me) it happens neither in Real Life™ games nor in online games with people I’m acquainted with, no matter how distantly.

Well, I remember having had the biggest problems with seeing people observe my games, especially friends. Playing against strangers wasn't difficult. But after a loss I blamed myself for making (stupid) mistakes. (So I became frightened of even starting a game.) When my rank got worse I thought about other people seeing that I got weaker. I paid way too much attention to what others might think about me or my playing and forgor the fun Well, I hope I've grown up now. Making my steps forwards or backwards public with a Blog is kind of an exposure therapy

Bonobo wrote: I assume you already know the German DGoB forum … ?

I do! Thanks anyway.

@xed_over
You're right, but I guess it would still be very discouraging to lose every single game you play
I agree, that you can learn more from a lost game than from a won game but one should not forget that motivation also is important to learn something. And motivation would drop for sure if I lost 100 ot of 100 games. Sometimes you just need a little victory for your psyche. That's human nature.

Welcome.

Willkommen!

Hopefully you will find life in 19x19 a gemutlich place.

I also worry about my rank I have to remember it is about playing your best enjoying the game and concentrating on the board.

Have fun!

Welcome! I'm in pretty much the same boat. Afraid to make mistakes and seem stupid. Haven't really been studying either, which I know isn't helping. I've got to get back on the virtual horse and try again. It's the only way.

Rowen wrote:Welcome! I'm in pretty much the same boat. Afraid to make mistakes and seem stupid. Haven't really been studying either, which I know isn't helping. I've got to get back on the virtual horse and try again. It's the only way.

Giddyup cowboy!

goTony wrote:

Rowen wrote:Welcome! I'm in pretty much the same boat. Afraid to make mistakes and seem stupid. Haven't really been studying either, which I know isn't helping. I've got to get back on the virtual horse and try again. It's the only way.

Giddyup cowboy!

Couldn't have said it better! Now to actually do it.....

Rowen wrote:

goTony wrote:

Rowen wrote:Welcome! I'm in pretty much the same boat. Afraid to make mistakes and seem stupid. Haven't really been studying either, which I know isn't helping. I've got to get back on the virtual horse and try again. It's the only way.

Giddyup cowboy!

Couldn't have said it better! Now to actually do it.....

Do cowboys play GO?