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Offline NoSkill
 Post subject: Story i wrote
Post #1 Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2011 12:36 pm 
Lives with ko

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http://www.wattpad.com/2243059-the-rose ... rsion?d=ud

Criticism would be much appreciated!
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Offline HermanHiddema
 Post subject: Re: Story i wrote
Post #2 Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2011 2:42 am 
Gosei
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Very nice. The start feels a bit off, but it settles into the right kind of tempo after that.

BTW, this might be better suited to the Creative Writing section, instead of the Off Topic section :)
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